I know i've been really bad about posts lately...just innundated with work and absolutely no time to breathe!
In the middle of this otherwise hectic work filled week I went out last night. My friend Poz threw a party at Opus which was choked to the gills with page 3 people all air kissing and being seen. Since I also air kiss thats not up for scrutiny. The highlight of the evening was Gina making me her world famous in Bangalore Apple Martini....for the uninitiated this is the most brilliant tasting drink ever...really! If you're ever at Opus ask for one:)
This utterly delightful girl I met came with me to above mentioned shindig. Her boyfriend joined us and we wound up at a friends house. Boyfriend of delightful girl then proceeded to make me feel like crap for not being "desi" enough. Meaning I can't pick Amol Palekar out of a line up or sing a Geeta Dutt song.
That annoyed the hell out of me. Just who define's desi-ness?
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Monday, June 25, 2007
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Weddings....
I went to a friends wedding ....someone i've known growing up....we've discussed boys....kissing techniques...clothes....life...
when I saw her standing on the stage decorated with flowers...all dressed up in saree and lots of beautiful jewellery talking to me with so much confidence and her heart swelling with pride...In that one momentI felt like such a .....child
when I saw her standing on the stage decorated with flowers...all dressed up in saree and lots of beautiful jewellery talking to me with so much confidence and her heart swelling with pride...In that one momentI felt like such a .....child
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
la la la la la feeling groovy....
Ever have one of those days when you're stressed out of your head but you seem to float through it with a zen like calm?...a bizarre sense of stillness takes over you and everything around you is like a snazzily edited music video....colours,voices, smells whizz past you and the only thing in your head is some totally inappropriate song?
yeah...la la la la la feeling groovy...
yeah...la la la la la feeling groovy...
Monday, June 18, 2007
Beauty ...The Beast...
For atleast 17 of my 27 years i've had several conversations with diverse groups of people on the subject of attractiveness. What makes someone attractive?Do attractive people get better jobs/boys/girls/money etc.. . Since I'm a woman I have to admit I end up dissecting another woman's claim to good looks far more than I would a man's. Stuff like "she's ok...nice skin ...good hair...but needs to knock off ten pounds" we all do it. All the time. As im becoming more a "grown up" than i've ever been it really affects me ...this issue of attractiveness and what it supposedly does or doesn't do for you.
I am considered attractive ( ascertained by a highly unscientific poll of men I know:)). As a fairly intelligent woman it upsets me greatly that I care if people think I look good. A friend of mine(Blinky) pointed out, highly amused, that I'd much rather have people think I'm and idiot than have people think i'm ugly. True.
I spent an entire day after that conversation wondering how I could be so shallow. Did I really value my attractiveness over my intelligence? The answer is I don't. I'm more likely to contest a woman's claim to intelligence because thats what I value more about myself.
Thats when it struck me....to women good looks is power. In a sick twisted way it's currency. The prettier you are the easier your life is is the perception amongst most people. Women will view another woman who may be more attractive with suspiscion ...much the same way a rich powerful man views a richer more powerful man. It doesn't seem to matter that as women we've worked so hard for so long to be viewed as so much more than pretty young things.... we still seem to subscribe to the age old stereotype that beauty is to be valued. Highly.
My uber feminist friends tell me that we value beauty so much because men constantly judge us on what we look like. At the risk of seriously pissing some of my friends off, I don't think thats fair to men at all. I know several men that have graciously patted bimbettes that have come their way on the head (ok....mostly on the ass) and opted for women that have some serious IQ's. I refuse to believe that men are the root cause of this one!
Which brings me back to the beauty=power theory. See, I think beautiful women learn very early on how to manipulate the world into giving them whatever they want without much effort. That's just it. It's not like you can't work...earn money and THEN buy whatever it is your heart desires...hell millions of men do exactly that! It's just that pretty women quickly figure "screw that...i'll just let my abundant cuteness do the work instead. The world owes me coz im just so darn pretty".
The crappy thing is it works. Look at models! Who the hell gets paid millions just 'coz they happen to have great DNA!
Blinky, i'd like to change my answer. I'd rather the world think Im ugly than have them think i'm and idiot.
I am considered attractive ( ascertained by a highly unscientific poll of men I know:)). As a fairly intelligent woman it upsets me greatly that I care if people think I look good. A friend of mine(Blinky) pointed out, highly amused, that I'd much rather have people think I'm and idiot than have people think i'm ugly. True.
I spent an entire day after that conversation wondering how I could be so shallow. Did I really value my attractiveness over my intelligence? The answer is I don't. I'm more likely to contest a woman's claim to intelligence because thats what I value more about myself.
Thats when it struck me....to women good looks is power. In a sick twisted way it's currency. The prettier you are the easier your life is is the perception amongst most people. Women will view another woman who may be more attractive with suspiscion ...much the same way a rich powerful man views a richer more powerful man. It doesn't seem to matter that as women we've worked so hard for so long to be viewed as so much more than pretty young things.... we still seem to subscribe to the age old stereotype that beauty is to be valued. Highly.
My uber feminist friends tell me that we value beauty so much because men constantly judge us on what we look like. At the risk of seriously pissing some of my friends off, I don't think thats fair to men at all. I know several men that have graciously patted bimbettes that have come their way on the head (ok....mostly on the ass) and opted for women that have some serious IQ's. I refuse to believe that men are the root cause of this one!
Which brings me back to the beauty=power theory. See, I think beautiful women learn very early on how to manipulate the world into giving them whatever they want without much effort. That's just it. It's not like you can't work...earn money and THEN buy whatever it is your heart desires...hell millions of men do exactly that! It's just that pretty women quickly figure "screw that...i'll just let my abundant cuteness do the work instead. The world owes me coz im just so darn pretty".
The crappy thing is it works. Look at models! Who the hell gets paid millions just 'coz they happen to have great DNA!
Blinky, i'd like to change my answer. I'd rather the world think Im ugly than have them think i'm and idiot.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Lists....
My favourite books...one's that i read atleast once a year...like i'm visiting an old friend..
- Algebra of Infinite Justice by Arundhati Roy because I sometimes forget what a complex,scary, issues filled world I live in and that i ought to do my bit to change things around me.
- Memoirs of a Giesha by Arthur Golden because Japan fascinates me and as soon as I save some money im spending a year travelling all over that country armed with a hello kitty backpack filled with jasmine tea:)
-Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen because some part of me believes that I should have been born in age where people dressed for dinner and sighed from a distance and fell in love forever with noblemen.
-The Jeeves and Wooster series by P.G. Woodehouse because no one does funny like Woodehouse and no one ever will.
-The Road Less Travelled by M. Scott Peck because I love analyzing unsuspecting victims...Muahahahaha:)
My favourite hotties.....my tastes in men change like the seasons but some have stayed on my list from the time I was 16....Brava hotties! Take a bow:)
-Pierce Brosnan...two words...Remmington Steel :)
-Gael Garcia Bernal because he played Che Guevara in Motorcycle Diaries
- Hugh Laurie in House M.D. because I have a soft spot for brilliant, emotionally unavailable, sarcastic men...sigh...
-Jakob Dylan...who knew Bob Dylan could have created that??
-Shashi Tharoor....because he's what I think the world should see Indians as. Smart, articulate and cute in an offbeat way:)
See? I can write shiny happy stuff:)
- Algebra of Infinite Justice by Arundhati Roy because I sometimes forget what a complex,scary, issues filled world I live in and that i ought to do my bit to change things around me.
- Memoirs of a Giesha by Arthur Golden because Japan fascinates me and as soon as I save some money im spending a year travelling all over that country armed with a hello kitty backpack filled with jasmine tea:)
-Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen because some part of me believes that I should have been born in age where people dressed for dinner and sighed from a distance and fell in love forever with noblemen.
-The Jeeves and Wooster series by P.G. Woodehouse because no one does funny like Woodehouse and no one ever will.
-The Road Less Travelled by M. Scott Peck because I love analyzing unsuspecting victims...Muahahahaha:)
My favourite hotties.....my tastes in men change like the seasons but some have stayed on my list from the time I was 16....Brava hotties! Take a bow:)
-Pierce Brosnan...two words...Remmington Steel :)
-Gael Garcia Bernal because he played Che Guevara in Motorcycle Diaries
- Hugh Laurie in House M.D. because I have a soft spot for brilliant, emotionally unavailable, sarcastic men...sigh...
-Jakob Dylan...who knew Bob Dylan could have created that??
-Shashi Tharoor....because he's what I think the world should see Indians as. Smart, articulate and cute in an offbeat way:)
See? I can write shiny happy stuff:)
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Sick and surly
Visiting relatives from Chennai have helpfully gifted me the flu. Complete with sore throat,fever and sinus headache which has made me very very cranky. It's strange to me how I seem to handle bigger ailments with equanimity...dignity even but when I get a cold im a snarling, nasty monster.
Im channeling all my snarliness into a makeshift soapbox on which I will stand and scream (ok whisper) and rant and rave about things that are pissing me off currently.
- The way the media carries stories of handicapped people. Saw this thing on TV where this man has started an organisation for blind people to meet and get married. Honourable is what the news reporter tried to paint it as. Really???? Blind people, deaf people, lame people are...hold your breath now....PEOPLE. Why do we marginalize them to such an extent that we think that they should stick with their own kind? so we can pat ourselves on the back for magnanimously helping them? I really want to know if the marriage bereau guy who is not blind is married to a blind person? That is true acceptance.
There's a very small NGO here in Bangalore called 'Margadashi' that is run by three women afflicted by polio. They help provide vocational education and life partners for similarly afflicted women. "Real lives in the Real world." When are we going to start seeing Indian versions of Lance Armstrong? Hero's that are as mainstream as Shah Rukh Khan? That can sell you a car, be loaded and get the pretty girl/boy in the end?
-A Peepal tree planted by a Bhramin in Tamil Nadu married a Neem tree in an elaborate wedding ceremony yesterday. The Peepal tree is also Bhramin and the blushing bride a Neem tree (apparently female according to a mention in the scriptures) belongs to the same caste. Er...Mazltov?
-86% of Indian men consider fair women more virtuous than dusky women. Interestingly roughly the same numbers consider dusky women more sexually appealing than their fairer counterparts. Thats my latest argument for not putting out to every dweeb i meet. Im also using fair and lovely so in14 days i can become noticeably fairer and ensure a ticket to heaven. Hahaha
-Im 27 and I look about 23 according to everyone I know. This is relevant when I get disapproving stares from aunty/uncle types if im holding a drink or a ciggarette in my hand. Im 27 dammit! I've earned my vices.
-Mango clothes go out of shape after their first wash. Outrageous I tell you considering how bloody expensive they are.
-People come over to visit me or stay in my house and expect me to chain up my dog (see tofu pics in this blog). How dare you? He lives here. You don't. Suck it up! If you're scared of him ( he's a labrador!!!! They're the tamest breed there is) don't come to my house. It had to be said.
I promise my next post will be all sweetness and sunshine...really:)
Im channeling all my snarliness into a makeshift soapbox on which I will stand and scream (ok whisper) and rant and rave about things that are pissing me off currently.
- The way the media carries stories of handicapped people. Saw this thing on TV where this man has started an organisation for blind people to meet and get married. Honourable is what the news reporter tried to paint it as. Really???? Blind people, deaf people, lame people are...hold your breath now....PEOPLE. Why do we marginalize them to such an extent that we think that they should stick with their own kind? so we can pat ourselves on the back for magnanimously helping them? I really want to know if the marriage bereau guy who is not blind is married to a blind person? That is true acceptance.
There's a very small NGO here in Bangalore called 'Margadashi' that is run by three women afflicted by polio. They help provide vocational education and life partners for similarly afflicted women. "Real lives in the Real world." When are we going to start seeing Indian versions of Lance Armstrong? Hero's that are as mainstream as Shah Rukh Khan? That can sell you a car, be loaded and get the pretty girl/boy in the end?
-A Peepal tree planted by a Bhramin in Tamil Nadu married a Neem tree in an elaborate wedding ceremony yesterday. The Peepal tree is also Bhramin and the blushing bride a Neem tree (apparently female according to a mention in the scriptures) belongs to the same caste. Er...Mazltov?
-86% of Indian men consider fair women more virtuous than dusky women. Interestingly roughly the same numbers consider dusky women more sexually appealing than their fairer counterparts. Thats my latest argument for not putting out to every dweeb i meet. Im also using fair and lovely so in14 days i can become noticeably fairer and ensure a ticket to heaven. Hahaha
-Im 27 and I look about 23 according to everyone I know. This is relevant when I get disapproving stares from aunty/uncle types if im holding a drink or a ciggarette in my hand. Im 27 dammit! I've earned my vices.
-Mango clothes go out of shape after their first wash. Outrageous I tell you considering how bloody expensive they are.
-People come over to visit me or stay in my house and expect me to chain up my dog (see tofu pics in this blog). How dare you? He lives here. You don't. Suck it up! If you're scared of him ( he's a labrador!!!! They're the tamest breed there is) don't come to my house. It had to be said.
I promise my next post will be all sweetness and sunshine...really:)
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